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Toddlers and preschoolers love to explore their world and discover the delights of mastering new experiences. When confident about the whereabouts of their loved ones and the security they provide, children can venture away with only occasional returns for refueling.

However, when young children encounter stressful events, the balance between exploration and security tips, and the need for support and reassurance takes priority. Events that upset children’s familiar routines are especially difficult, since routines provide the framework within which new experiences become manageable.

For some children the experience of having and becoming a sibling is likely to be among the most stressful of early childhood. With the arrival of a new baby, both familiar routines and familiar relationships begin to take on unexpected dimensions, Mommy’s lap and Daddy’s attention may not be as available after the new baby’s birth, even though they may be needed more than ever. To many children the new baby seems to replace the old one. As Stein says, “And why would a mother want a new baby, unless the old one were not good enough?” Some clinicians even go so far as to compare the birth of a sibling to the death of a parent in terms of its potential significance for later personality development.

Students also may bring their problems at home to school with them. If a student’s family is experiencing violence, unemployment, alcohol or drug use by a family member, problems with the law, or any other upsetting experience, it can be difficult to concentrate on schoolwork. Many students who are having family problems might have trouble controlling their anger and frustration at school, and they may end up in trouble because of their behavior.

Some students who are overburdened at home by circumstances that make it necessary for them to “parent” siblings, hold a job, or care for an ill or impaired parent may find it impossible to keep up. Many times students who face overwhelming family or personal problems keep these problems to themselves. School counselors can help support a student and prevent failure if they are made aware of the problem.